Archive for the ‘Journal’ Category

Day 8   1 comment

I need to have a morning routine. I believe it can set the right tone for the whole day ahead. Having no set work schedule, I tend to stay up long (I guess I am an owl by nature but, at the same time, I think earlier bedtime and earlier mornings might do me some good) and have ‘lazy’ start in front of my computer (email, Facebook, etc) over a coffee or two… There definitely is a connection between such ‘lifestyle’ and unhealthy cravings later in the day.

NOT A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE.

From tomorrow, I’d like to introduce a morning routine. It needs to be simple, 5 points max, and should include prayer and getting dressed preferably within 30 minutes from rising.

  1. open bedroom window/ exercise
  2. have a glass of water/quiet time with God
  3. healthy breakfast
  4. shower/make-up/hair/get dressed
  5. make the bed

Posted October 8, 2011 by wisewoman21 in Journal

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Day 7   Leave a comment

I believe insufficient water consumption is contributing to my overeating and feeling sluggish. So I’m tackling this issue by:

  1. making a note of every cup of tea/coffee and every glass of water that I drink throughout the day
  2. aiming at decreasing the amount of coffee (on some days I have 2 cups even before noon!!!) while increasing water (goal: 8 glasses – so far I’m drinking a maximum of 4 on a ‘good’ day).
Success: I managed to limit caffeine intake today. At a working meeting in a cafe, I chose red bush tea rather than coffee.Failure: The pizza I didn’t have yesterday still haunted me this evening.  And, sadly, I yielded to the temptation… Well, at least it wasn’t a large one and had mostly vegetable topping.

Day 6   1 comment

I woke up feeling much better than yesterday – the painkillers I took at bedtime had worked. So, a good start 🙂 Another rather hectic day, though, with trying to organize work and catching up on tasks which I was unable to complete yesterday.

On the habit formation front, I’m still making a note of how many coffees/teas vs glasses of water I drink throughout the day.

Unfortunately, I did not make time to read another chapter from ‘Made To Crave’ so I’m even more behind now. Not good and quite demoralizing, really.

On my way home I felt so cold (yes, summer’s is officially over) that I started having obsessive thoughts about ordering a pizza. I’ve noticed this destructive pattern of craving pizza when I’m very tired/cold/have a reason to celebrate. What makes it especially unhealthy and dangerous is that I usually will have the whole pizza for myself. I also tend to want to finish it all in one evening… I’m very embarrassed admitting this now but it’s… well, true 😦

I didn’t get the pizza tonight. I wish I could report that I chose to pray, as per yesterday’s lesson, to overcome the temptation. However, instead of asking God to save me from the unhealthy craving, I was ‘saved’ by circumstances. I was determined to call a restaurant or get a frozen pizza, but, fortunately for me, all pizza parlors in the area were closed already and so were the shops (it was very late in the evening). Yes, I did not eat the pizza. But it wasn’t a spiritual victory, and this is what I’m really after.

Apologies to you, dear reader, for the negative tone of this post. I’m simply trying to be honest with myself about my struggle and where I’m at.

Day 5   Leave a comment

Wise woman… right…
New responsibilities and different obligations are mounting with trying to organize the new job. I’m so very stressed. On top of that, my health is not great at the moment which makes anxiety level soar. I was in a lot of pain today and had to take quite a strong medicine. Half a day lost…

I’m pretty sure I would benefit in my current situation from having a healthy dietary regime.

Oh, wait, I did introduce one practical thing today. I’d noticed I wasn’t drinking enough. As a result, I feel tired or sometimes my brain interprets it as hunger rather than thirst, and I grab something quick to eat (unhealthy option, of course, because it’s easier and faster…). So I decided to make a note of each glass/cup of liquid I drink.
The ‘tool’ I’ve ‘designed’ for keeping track of quantity drunk, is a piece of paper stuck to a cupboard door. I mark each glass of water or cup of tea/coffee drunk (water – good, coffee – not so good).
Not much but at least it’s something.

I also read a chapter from ‘Made To Crave’. I’m 2 days behind with the reading but will get there :). I was only able to open the book at bedtime, when the painkillers started to really work. I read Chapter 2, ‘Replacing My Cravings’ where Lysa asks the ‘raw question’… It is rather shocking when you admit that you love and rely on food more than God. Well, of course, not all the time – that would be really sad. But yes, it sometimes looks like I do. Sometimes it looks like I believe that eating a certain food will make me feel happy or less stressed.

I really want to turn to God for comfort and peace instead. This chapter says that I need to pray whenever I feel tempted to seek solution in food. Prayer is a way of ‘tearing down the tower of impossibility’ when we feel trapped in this cycle of defeat.

I was really touched by Lysa’s example prayers. They’re so honest and they show how we can trust our Lord with even seemingly trivial problems. I particularly like the one where she admits before God to her particular food craving at the moment but is making a choice to eat a healthy, nutritious breakfast instead. She’s making a choice to celebrate what she can have rather than lamenting over the ‘forbidden fruit’.

Yes, it’s all about making the right, conscious and educated choices, isn’t it.

Day 4   Leave a comment

Today was clouded by guilt… I mean, I have only just began my challenge and am failing already… I haven’t organized my day well enough in order to read a chapter from ‘Made To Crave’. True, I’ve had to cope with some unexpected extra responsibilities, but nevertheless I am slightly disappointed with myself… Instead of beating myself up, though, I’ll take a deep breath and do my best to continue.
I still need to sit down for a moment and create a good plan of practical actions.

Posted October 7, 2011 by wisewoman21 in Journal

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Day 3   Leave a comment

I’m afraid I haven’t been a very “wise woman” today… My inability to say “No” prevented me from accomplishing my plan. That’s inability to part with my friends in time to do what I had committed to do… Well, one of the lessons I still need to learn.

Posted October 4, 2011 by wisewoman21 in Journal

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Day 2   Leave a comment

Today I re-read Introduction: Finding Your “Want To” and Chapter 1: What’s Really Going On Here? of the book that accompanies me on my 21-day journey, Made To Crave by Lysa TerKeurst.

I was successful at losing quite a lot of weight and growing closer to God in the process (or the other way around) some six months ago. Some of the weight has returned so I need to take care of that – I felt so much better physically those nine pounds ago. More importantly, though, I need to refocus from thinking about my weight and appearance to fixing my gaze on God. I want Him to be the object of my desire and the source of my self-worth. Like Lysa,  I am “a simple Jesus girl on a journey to finding deeper motivation than just  a number on my scale for getting and staying healthy”.

This is about good stewardship (looking after the good and amazing body that God gave me), wisdom and making good use of my free will. I have freedom to make good choices. That includes food choices, choosing my thoughts, making a deliberate effort to exercise.

The first two days of the journey that I’m documenting here have been a kind of warm-up. I haven’t yet planned out my diet or exercise routine for the next 3 weeks (and beyond). I didn’t have any disastrous episodes with food yesterday or today but I wasn’t eating to well, either. I had a lot of outdoor physical activity (a 6-hour hike in the woods on Saturday and a walk with a very active 2-year old today) which I feel very good about.

I don’t want to obsess about my weight or food, or exercise. Rather, I wish to focus more on God and look to His Word rather than elsewhere, to find satisfaction. ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’ (Matthew 4:4, NIV)

Tomorrow I’d like to make  a plan regarding the practical choices that I’m going to make during the following weeks. That includes my Bible study plan, diet and exercise.